


Goodbye Sweet Yesterday

by kathyswizards



Series: Darkness, Take My Hand [2]
Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: 'cause Kathy don't do no sad endings, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Happy Ending, Hunted by the Enemy, Memory Loss, No one can be trusted, One Shot, Post-Star Wars: The Last Jedi, Pursuit, Something has gone very wrong, revisiting the past
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-11-24 16:47:03
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,808
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20910869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kathyswizards/pseuds/kathyswizards
Summary: Rey came back to consciousness with a gasp. She sat at the controls of an unfamiliar ship. Alarms were shrieking. Outside the viewport, the menacing white wedge of a First Order star destroyer loomed against the starfield. A swarm of TIEs swooped toward her through a sparking, glittering curtain of debris.The comm blinked with an incoming transmission: “We have a lock on you. Prepare to be tractored in.”Rey slapped off the comm. “Oh no, you won’t.”She didn’t bother plotting a course. Just slammed the controls to send the ship to lightspeed.Rey doesn't know what happened, where she is, what she's been doing or how she got on this ship. She only knows Kylo Ren is after her. And she'd better run.NOTE: Don't worry, this fic has a happy ending!😉





	Goodbye Sweet Yesterday

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Princess_of_Jakku](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Princess_of_Jakku/gifts).

> This fic takes place ten years after the events in ["Darkness, Take My Hand."](https://archiveofourown.org/works/14194050/chapters/32718297)
> 
> I'm dedicating it to Princess of Jakku, who made the suggestion. Thanks, Princess!

**45 ABY – 10 years after the ratification of the New Order Galactic Self-Determination Compact**

Rey came back to consciousness with a gasp. She felt like the marrow had been sucked out of her bones. Her head throbbed blindingly. Squinting with pain, she sat up, trying to place herself.

She sat at the controls of an unfamiliar ship. Alarms were shrieking. Outside the viewport, the menacing white wedge of a First Order star destroyer loomed against the starfield. A swarm of TIEs swooped toward her through a sparking, glittering curtain of debris.

The comm blinked with an incoming transmission: “_Brightshadow_. We have a lock on you. Prepare to be tractored in.”

Rey slapped off the comm. “Oh no, you won’t.”

She didn’t bother plotting a course. Just slammed the controls to send the ship to lightspeed.

The stars compressed and disappeared.

* * *

Outside the triangular viewports of the star destroyer _Dark Sun_, the flagship of Grand Master Kylo Ren, red and green slashes of laser- and cannonfire stitched the black of space. TIEs swooped and dove. An enemy ship exploded in a bloom of hot yellow unfurling to red.

In the middle of it all, the shuttle stretched and popped out of existence. Kylo clenched his fists, breathing hard.

“She’s gone to lightspeed, sir,” Admiral Arkady reported unnecessarily.

“Track her.” Kylo’s voice had a tight, dangerous edge to it. “I want her retrieved. Immediately.”

“Communications,” Arkady snapped. “Notify the captains of the Outer Rim contingent. I want every ship here and ready to take action.”

The entire bridge crew jumped, focusing on their stations. No one so much as raised their eyes.

Kylo’s fury rippled through the air. He paced, clenching and unclenching his black-gloved hands.

He knew her well. He knew how she reacted to threat. A near-miss, and the scavenger’s survival instinct had taken over, sending her into flight. She’d be looking for someplace safe, somewhere to go to ground.

Kylo turned to the white-jacketed Security Bureau commissioner standing with Arkady. “I want a full assessment of where she’s likely to go. Who she’s likely to communicate with. Send advance teams to intercept her.”

Commissioner Dare’s dark face looked sickly, as if he saw an imminent end to his life. “Yes, sir.” He took an unsteady breath. “I take full responsibility for the incident, sir. We should’ve known—”

Kylo cut him off. “Yes. You should have.” He fixed Dare with a black stare. “Find Rey. Bring her to me.”

In a whirl of black cloak, he turned and strode off.

* * *

The blue-streaked tunnel of hyperspace spun past the shuttle’s viewport. Rey ran her hands over the controls, trying to quell her rising panic.

Something was very, very wrong. There was a huge hole in her memory. She didn’t know this ship—the _Brightshadow?_—though it seemed she somehow knew how to fly it. She didn’t remember boarding it, or what she’d been doing before. She had no idea how she`d gotten here.

She touched the strange lightsaber at her belt. This wasn’t the plain silver and black one she’d taken to Luke Skywalker. It was rough, pitted and scored, as if the components had been scavenged.

She snapped it loose and stood. Taking a step back, she hesitated, then ignited it.

With a _vssshhh_ of plasma, a brilliant green blade haloed with red extended. Rey sucked a breath and dropped the weapon as if burned. The blade retracted, and the rugged-looking hilt spun a half turn on the deck.

The lightsaber—or something in it—seemed to reach out to her, trying to calm her thundering heart. She fought it, wanting nothing but away from the uncanny thing. Almost against her will, she bent. Her fingers closed around the hilt. Shuddering, she snapped it back to her belt. She might not want to touch it, but you didn’t throw away a perfectly good weapon.

She took a long breath, forcing herself to think. Whatever had happened, there would be records. Sitting down at the controls again, she brought up the shuttle’s flight logs.

A list of planets and times scrolled down the screen. About the only ones she’d heard of were Coruscant and Corellia. She’d never been to either one. The shuttle might’ve been there, but not her.

She bit her lip. The only thing to do was go to planets she _had_ been to—and hope the First Order wasn’t looking for her there.

* * *

Rey’s nerves were strung so tight she was almost sick when she dropped out of hyperspace beyond D’Qar’s rings. The proximity alarms blared. Her hand whipped to the controls to bring up shields. Just in time—her shields flared white as a piece of debris hit.

Debris was everywhere, almost as thick as the rocky bits of D’Qar’s rings. Most was unidentifiable, but part of a TIE solar panel went spinning past here, a sensor dish there. Something that looked like it might’ve been a body. Her stomach knotted. This much debris meant there’d been a major space battle fought above D’Qar.

She arrowed for the planet. Her shields glowed with the heat of entry as she slipped down into the atmosphere.

Everything in her went cold when she dipped below the clouds, in sight of the Resistance base—

Except there was no Resistance base. Where the base should’ve been, a crater gaped open to the grey sky.

“Oh, no,” she breathed.

_Finn_. _Leia_. Had they been here when this happened?

It wouldn’t do any good. She knew it wouldn’t. Still, she landed on a scrap of still-intact duracrete at the base’s edge.

She stepped carefully on the heaved, weed-grown pavement as she disembarked. A fine drizzle misted down, quickly furring her clothes with tiny droplets. Her footsteps seemed to fall dead in the heavy air. There was no smell of burning or explosives or plasma, only of wet pavement and damp vegetation.

She picked her away across the shattered wreckage that had once been bunkers and landing pads. Moss and grass and even saplings as tall as she had invaded the burned, broken, once-molten debris.

That hole in her memory yawned wider. Her mind told her this had been a busy, thriving place only a short while ago. What she saw in front of her said it had been much, much longer than that. Hugging herself, she shivered—and not against the cold, damp air.

A familiar howl came from above the low-hanging clouds. Adrenaline spiked through her in a cold rush. Rey spun and bolted back over the space she’d just crossed, her feet sliding dangerously on loose rubble.

She hit the boarding ramp just as three TIEs broke the cloud deck. She slammed the hatch controls on the way past, scrambled to the cockpit and dove for the controls. She had shields up and engines online before she slid into the pilot’s seat.

The TIEs howled past so close she instinctively ducked. She fired the engines and the shuttle shot into the air.

Rey stayed low, banking and diving to keep the TIEs from getting a lock on her. The low hills dipped and rose below her, a textured green blur. The clouds descended. Pearly nothingness pressed against the viewport and tattered away again as she broke out.

The TIEs were still on her, matching her maneuver for maneuver. Rey suddenly realized—_they hadn’t fired once_. Just followed.

They meant to take her alive.

She gave the engines full power and pulled into a steep climb, the three TIEs trailing behind her. The atmosphere thinned, the sky going from blue to indigo to star-sprinkled black.

The sensors started screaming again. TIEs swarmed toward her, black specks against the stars. She didn’t bother trying to catch a visual of the star destroyer they launched from, just shoved the shuttle into hyperspace again.

* * *

“D’Qar.” Kylo Ren lowered his lightsaber. The blade spat and crackled menacingly in his bare fist. “What was she doing there?”

Commissioner Dare had interrupted the Grand Master in his training room, something he’d never do ordinarily. Ren’s arms and neck glistened with sweat under the harsh lights. Damp strands of his black hair stuck to his jaw and temples.

Dare swallowed, trying to ignore the hacked-up pieces of training droids scattered around the space. Ren wasn’t a calm-tempered man under the best of circumstances. These were certainly not that.

“D’Qar was not among the places we’d anticipated.” Dare admitted.

The Grand Master’s face darkened.

Dare wet his lips—or tried to. “She deactivated the tracker on her shuttle. We used the hyperspace tracker to trace her there.”

Ren narrowed his eyes, considering. “The site of the destroyed Resistance base.” His gaze came back to Dare. “You didn’t catch her.”

Relentlessly, Dare kept his chin up and his voice level. “No, sir. She went to lightspeed before we could get a lock on her.”

The Grand Master’s grip on his lightsaber tightened, twisting the weapon in his hand.

“She’s just dropped out of hyperspace at Ahch-To,” Dare hurried to assure him. “We expect no difficulty retrieving her there.”

“D’Qar. Ahch-To.” Ren’s tone was thoughtful. The lightsaber’s hissing red blade retracted into the hilt. “No. Track her movements, but don’t interfere with her.” His black brows drew together. “She’s retracing her past. I know where she’ll go. It won’t be long before we have her.”

* * *

It was midmorning when Rey swept in toward the sacred Jedi island. The twin suns poured a path of liquid gold over Ahch-To’s restless ocean. She landed where the Falcon had…when? A year ago? Or…longer?

She hadn’t climbed a dozen of the stairs that wound up the island’s steep, rocky slope before shouting voices echoed down to her. The next moment, eight or ten children appeared, flying down the stairs at reckless speed.

Rey stopped where she stood. _Kids?_ On Ahch-To? What—

“Rey!” a girl in front cried, her curly brown hair bouncing like springs as she ran. “It’s Rey! I _told_ you so.”

There were several humans, a Twi’lek, a Torgruta and a Rodian between about ten years old to maybe thirteen or fourteen.

The Twi’lek shouted, “Look, Rey! Look what I can do!” Without missing a step, he raised his hand.

The Torgruta boy, rather than landing on the next step down, suddenly lifted into the air. He screamed a high, girly scream. “Put me down! Cazne, I swear. I’m going to kill you!”

Despite everything, Rey stifled a laugh. “I think you’d better put him down. Gently.”

The Torgruta boy drifted down to land (gently) on the step above Rey’s. He immediately spun and ran back up to face his tormentor. The Twi’lek turned and ran, laughing and shouting taunts.

The others swept around her in a babble of excited voices and bubbling energy.

The curly-haired girl was at the younger end of the group—maybe eleven or twelve—but she seemed to be the spokesperson. She chattered about people Rey didn’t know. The other kids put in additions or corrections. The curly-haired girl amended her narrative as if that was what she’d meant to say all along.

The long climb brought them to the Jedi village. Instead of the sad air of abandonment she’d known there, the place bustled. Two teens sparred with practice blades in the small, stone-paved court. A boy and a girl helped the Caretakers hang laundry in the breezy air. Four young people in their early twenties sat in serious discussion on a low, semicircular stone bench.

A young man of maybe eighteen or nineteen watching the lightsaber practice looked up as Rey and her entourage trooped into the village. Instantly, he crossed to her.

He hugged her hard and briefly. “We heard about the attack.” Taking her by the shoulders, he looked her carefully up and down, his round face creased with concern. “Are you hurt?”

Someone _else_ she was supposed to know. Strangely, Rey felt she _did_ know him…but didn’t. Not his name, or his face. The kids around them went quiet. Apparently this was the first they’d heard about the attack.

“No, I’m fine,” she said. “Other than I feel like I’ve been out in the sun without food or water for two or three days.”

The young man snorted. “_Yeah. _We heard how you used the Force.” He made a gesture of invitation. “Come on. Jiennevvennan can look you over. Luke was on his way to the mirror cave with Gem and Ri’en and Qulon. They’ve been showing too much light side. He’ll have sensed you. He’ll be on his way back.”

Rey let herself be guided along, too confused to object. The way she used the Force? Too much light side?

“Rey!” a rough, familiar voice called.

_Luke_. Someone she knew, at least. Relief flooded her. Rey turned—

And stumbled back. Luke was hurrying toward her, unmistakable in his Jedi robes. And completely unfamiliar at the same time.

He was _old_. His hair and beard were nearly all grey. Little trace remained of the tawny color she remembered.

He stopped short of her and studied her worriedly. “Rey? Are you all right?”

“I think she’s suffering some backlash, Master Luke,” the young man said. “I was taking her to Jienne.”

Luke kept studying her. “Yes. I can see that. Bring Jienne to my hut, Temiri. And food and something to drink. You _have_ eaten, haven’t you?” he asked Rey.

“I ate some rations aboard the shuttle,” she managed, trying not to stare at his too-old face.

“Good. But you need more and better than that.”

He guided Rey across the court. The kids gathered into a whispering knot behind them.

“Master Skywalker,” she said. “Something’s wrong—”

He sent her a sharp look. “What’s this ‘Master Skywalker?’ What happened to ‘Uncle Luke?’”

She fell silent, shocked. An edge of fear bled into her confusion.

He pushed open his hut’s door. The metal groaned and squeaked just the way she remembered. It was a small comfort.

“Something’s wrong,” she said again. She looked around the dim space. Nothing seemed to have changed there. There was a shelf cluttered with small personal effects. Visible past a partially closed curtain was a bed neatly made. “I—I’ve forgotten things…”

She trailed off, terrified of saying just how much she seemed to have forgotten. Afraid of the answers she might get.

Luke folded his arms. “Tell me what you remember.”

“I was in the shuttle. Alarms were going off. TIE fighters were everywhere. There was a First Order star destroyer—”

“Rey,” Luke interrupted. “There is no more First Order.”

“I know what I saw!” she flared. “I barely got out of there before they tractored me in. I went to the Resistance base on D’Qar. It’s _gone_. There’s nothing left but a hole in the ground. They showed up there, too. I think they’re trying to capture me alive.”

She didn’t want to think about why. Every instinct in her screamed for her to run. She looked around again, this time desperately.

Luke must’ve sensed her growing panic. He stepped forward, caught her hands. “Rey. You’re okay. You’re safe.”

She wrestled her panic down. “No. I’m not. And I’m afraid if I stay here long, you won’t be, either.”

Luke wasn’t much taller than she. It was easy for him to catch and hold her eyes with his bright blue ones. She wanted to pretend she didn’t see the wrinkles netting them.

“No one will hurt you,” he said. “I promise. No one will try to take you away if you don’t want to go.”

Her eyes ached with tears. She didn’t want to cry. Not now. She couldn’t afford it. One trickled down her cheek anyway. “Everything’s _changed_. All these people here are talking to me like I know them—and I _don’t_. What’s happening?”

He urged her to the bench against one wall, pressed her to sit. He sat next to her. “What do you remember before the attack?”

Taking a breath, Rey wiped her face with the back of one hand. “I came here with Chewie. I tried to give you the lightsaber, but you didn’t want it. You didn’t want me or Chewie here, either.”

A looked passed across Luke’s face so quickly it was hard to decipher. It looked like horror.

As if trying to erase it, he made a wry face, “That _would_ be what you remember. I’m sorry, Rey. I was fighting a demon then. If it’s any comfort, you’re welcome here now.” He covered her hand with his own, warm and strong where hers was cold. “In fact, I want you to stay. You’re right—something has happened, and I think it’ll take some time to fix.”

“But people are dying! Finn, Leia—”

Again, an expression flitted across his face. “No one is dying. You don’t have to worry about that.”

She stared hard at him. “You’re not telling me something.”

He bent his head. “I will. Just not now. And not all at once. Now, you need to rest. We have a hut set aside for guests—”

Rey leapt to her feet. “No. You’re trying to keep me here. Why?”

Luke gazed up at her. “You’re hurt—”

She clenched her fists. “Just tell me. The First Order won, didn’t they? That’s what I’ve missed. That’s what I’ve forgotten. They’ve taken over and they’re a threat to you—”

“No one is threatening us. Not me, not you, not anyone. There’s peace in the galaxy now.”

Something tight in her eased. “We defeated the First Order?”

Holding her eyes, he took a long breath. “No.”

She took a step back, then another.

He stood, reached out a hand as if to catch her. “Don’t try to run, Rey. It won’t do any good.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Her voice was high and wild.

He lowered his hand. “You’ve barely escaped with your life. It would be too much for you now. I’ll tell you everything you want to know…when you’re calmer.”

“If you won’t, I’ll find someone who will!” She flung the door open onto the island’s bright, cool, breezy air, darted out across the court. The youngsters bunched there scattered out of her way.

“Rey, wait!” Luke cried behind her.

She threw a glance back over her shoulder. Luke held out a hand, reaching for her again. She plunged down the stairs and he disappeared from sight.

* * *

If nothing else drove home how much she’d missed, it would’ve been Maz’s castle. Last time Rey had seen it, it was toppling under the might of the First Order’s fire. Now it loomed solid as ever against Takodana’s cloud-marbled sky.

There were differences. The statue of Maz with her arms outstretched in welcome was gone. The banners in the courtyard were fewer, several burned and tattered. A wing with windows set deep into the stone walls had been added on the side of the castle facing the lake. The stones of walls, steps and courtyard were a mix of age-darkened old and bright, fresh-hewed new. The door gleamed, new paint and shiny metal.

She tugged the hood of her dark cloak to better hide her face. Losing her peripheral vision made her skin creep, but it was better than being recognized. The door swept open. Resting her hand on her belt by her lightsaber, she stepped inside.

She swept the room with a glance. There were the familiar drinkers and gamers and dealers and who-knew-who else dressed in everything from worker’s drab to armor to nothing but fur or scales. There was a member of some species she’d never seen before. It—he? she?—had three yellow eyes and four arms and long ropes of black hair trailing down its back. She didn’t let herself stare as she passed where it sat alone at a table sipping a drink. 

Music of drums and harp and whistle wove through the chatter of voices and bursts of laughter, the rattle of gaming cubes. A mismatched assortment of tables and chairs contrasted jarringly with a sleek, backlit bar with lights that changed colors and flickered in intricate patterns. Rey couldn’t help it; she drifted toward it, fascinated.

She was smoothing a hand along the bar’s glossy surface, watching the patterns of light play against her skin when a familiar voice said:

“What can I get you?”

Rey looked up into Maz’s face. “Answers, I hope.”

Maz’s eyes went wide behind her lenses. The next instant, her gaze darted sharply around the room.

She came around the bar, caught Rey by the wrist and towed her across the cantina. “What are you doing _here_, girl? Half the galaxy is looking for you!”

Maz didn’t stop until she reached a table in the back, in the place’s most shadowy corner.

“Sit there.” She pulled out a chair whose back was to the room.

Rey hesitated, eying the armed Bothan casually weaving through the tables behind them.

“Don’t worry about Jehak,” Maz said. “He’ll make sure no one bothers us.”

The Bothan leaned against a stone column a little distance away. Rey and Maz sat.

Leaning forward, Maz said in a low voice, “This is the worst place you can come. There are people looking for you who you don’t want to find you.”

“I know,” Rey said with a frustrated huff. “I wouldn’t have come if I didn’t have to.” She looked down at the tabletop, idly tracing the letters carved there—_B + R_—then back up again. “I won’t stay long. I just need to know where I can go. Where it’s safe.”

Maz sat back, clearly startled. “Go home.” Her face changed, suddenly suspicious. “Is home no longer safe?”

Rey snorted. “Of all the not-safe places in the galaxy, Jakku is at the top of the list.”

“Not Jakku!” Maz said. “Chandrila.”

It was Rey’s turn to jerk back in startlement. “Chandrila! I’ve never lived on Chandrila.”

Had she? _Had she?_ She put her head in her hand. Her head spun, as if gravity itself had suddenly failed.

Maz was silent for a beat, then she ventured, “Where do you live, then?”

“I did live on Jakku. Now…” She trailed off. “I don’t know.”

“Where is your family?”

“You were the one who told me they’re never coming back!” Rey flared. “All I need to know is where to go to get away from the First Order. You told Finn—”

No, wait. Finn hadn’t gone to the Outer Rim. He was lying wounded on D’Qar after Starkiller Base. Her stomach sank. Not D’Qar.

Rey wet her lips. “Do you know anything about Finn? Did they get off D’Qar before it was attacked?”

“He and Rose are on his home world. On the Rim. They’ve been working on the rebuilding since Finn tracked down his family.” Maz reached across the table, looking worried. “Rey,” she said cautiously. “What’s happened to you, child?”

“I don’t know.” She lowered her head again. “I’m trying to find out. Everything is wrong. Everything is different.” She raised her head. “Except you. You’re the same.”

Maz cocked her head, considering, then held out her hand. “Let me see your lightsaber.”

Rey reached down, unclipped it and handed it to Maz.

She turned it over, studying it, then handed it back. “Do you know where you got this?”

Rey quickly clipped it to her belt, unwilling to handle it for long. “No. I don’t know what happened to the one you tried to give me, either.”

“I do,” Maz said, watching her carefully. “It was destroyed.”

“How? I gave it to Luke…” But he hadn’t wanted it. So she kept it. Then how—

Maz took Rey’s hand. “Do you trust me, child?”

Rey bit her lip. She hadn’t trusted Maz when she tried to give her Luke’s lightsaber. She’d run away—straight into Kylo Ren.

She swallowed. “I wouldn’t have come here if I didn’t.”

“Then go home,” Maz said. “To Chandrila. The answers you seek are there. So is the safety you seek.”

“But that’s not my—”

“I’ve told you it is,” Maz broke in. “You don’t believe me. I can give you answers to every question you ask, and you won’t believe those, either. You had to build your future for yourself. You’ll have to rebuild your past, as well.” Maz slid out of her chair. “Now come. Jehak will accompany you back to your ship.”

Rey pushed reluctantly to her feet. The yawning darkness in her mind dragged at her, trying to suck her down into terror. She trailed behind Maz to the burly Bothan.

“She’s returning to her ship,” Maz told the male. “If anyone tries to interfere, you know what to do.”

Baring an alarming number of very sharp, menacingly yellow teeth in a grin, the Bothan cracked his knuckles. “You bet, boss.”

“I can—” Rey began indignantly.

Maz stopped her. “I know you can. And if you activate that weapon where anyone can see it, they’ll know exactly who you are.” She took Rey’s hand. “Let Jehak take you to your ship so my castle survives your visit today.”

Rey’s face went hot. She ducked her head. “Okay. Thank you.”

Maz patted her hand and let go. “Take care of yourself, child, and do as I say. More people than you know would be devastated if anything happened to you.”

* * *

Kylo Ren stared at a holomap of the galaxy. He’d retreated to the _Dark Sun’s_ tactical briefing room when he could no longer bear the fear and dismay beating at him from the bridge crew. Ordinarily, he’d simply block it out. Now, it was all he could do to keep his rage from erupting into destructive fury

A path mapped in orange zig-zagged through the stars—Rey’s course. D’Qar to Ahch-To, Ahch-To to Takodana. He was certain what her next destination would be.

He sensed Dare’s presence before the door whisked open. The Security Bureau Commissioner walked in with one of the Nightfolk.

Dare’s gaze went to the holomap with its ragged orange line. “You received my report that Rey was placed at Takodana.”

“Did you determine why she was there?” Kylo said.

The Night-one’s three yellow eyes fixed on Kylo. Folding his four arms in his grey robes, his voice whispered into Kylo’s mind: _The Bright-one has been damaged. She seeks to understand how. Much of her memory is gone. She has pain. She has much fear. She does not know her family. She did not know us. She does not recognize her own weapon_.

Something in Kylo tightened to a fine, dangerous edge. “She’s vulnerable.”

“Very vulnerable, sir,” Dare said quietly. “She won’t know who she can trust.”

“No.” Kylo studied the holomap again. “She’s going to Jakku. Get a team there but keep things quiet. Cordon off Niima Outpost and the wrecked AT-AT out on the Goazon Badlands that was her shelter. I don’t want her getting out into the desert. Survival is what she does best. If she senses a trap, we’ll lose her again.” He turned a dark look on Dare. “Don’t make me hunt her through the dead hulks of Imperial star destroyers.”

“No, sir,” Dare said quietly. “That won’t be necessary.”

* * *

Rey had learned very young to pay attention to her instincts. Instinct had kept her alive on Jakku for fifteen long, hungry, brutal years while she waited in vain for her family to return for her.

Maz’s prediction came back to her: _Whoever you’re waiting for, they’re never coming back. But there’s someone who could_. Maybe her family had just been a dream to give her something to live for. Maybe not. But now instinct told her Jakku was where she needed to be.

Niima Outpost had changed too. Naturally. Wrapped up so only her eyes showed, a small blaster strapped to her thigh and concealed under her cloak, Rey wandered through the awning-shaded booths, noting every subtle difference.

There were the usual hawkers selling everything from starship parts to scavenged trinkets, hand-carved charms of bone or stones to bloggin pies and nightblossom-fruit jelly.

She glanced up as a pair of stormtroopers came around a corner. She didn’t let herself tense, only pretended fascination with ornately pierced lamps made from nightwatcher casings. The troopers stopped at the food vendor’s booth.

“Good day, Essen,” said the wrinkled brown woman tending it. “I have your favorite today. Prickleberry tarts.”

“Early for prickleberries, isn’t it?” the trooper replied.

The woman grinned, showing missing teeth. “Not if you know the right people.”

A chuckle came over the troopers’ vocabulators. “Put six aside for me, Ari. I’ll pick ‘em up when I’m off duty.”

They chit-chatted with the woman as she wrapped up the tarts. Rey lingered, eavesdropping.

_How’s that new great-grandbaby?_ they asked. _Crawling yet?_

It was all Rey could do not to goggle. She slipped away.

Unkar Plutt’s stall was gone, which meant Unkar must be gone, too. That explained the booths selling salvage—he hadn’t allowed any competition. She wondered what had happened to him, taking a happy moment to imagine what it could’ve been.

Where his stall had stood—

Rey looked, looked again. It was a _water processing station_.

A series of pipes plunged into the pale, gritty soil. The thump of pumps vibrated under her boots. A line of people waited to fill bottles, jugs, barrels, flasks. No one tried to stop them. No one demanded payment. Each person filled their containers and made room for the next in line.

She continued her explorations, watching closely. The familiar air of desperation, hopelessness and fear was gone. People weren’t prosperous, but they weren’t one bad day’s salvage away from starvation. She saw more stormtroopers. No one was afraid of them. No one tried to scuttle out of their way. Finally, she came to the last booth at the edge of the bazaar. She stopped and stared.

Ranks of tidy duracrete buildings dotted the flats outside Niima. Laundry strung on lines and the paraphernalia of everyday life marked them as dwellings. The people outside didn’t wear scavenged rags and castoffs, but plain tunics and trousers and skirts no worse for wear than could be expected for rough, dusty Jakku.

Nearby was another building blazoned with the word _MEDIC_. Outside yet another building, a dozen children of various ages ran and shouted and climbed on the bits of salvage of a makeshift playground until a tall red droid called them to come inside for lessons. A _school?_

Rey pulled down her wrappings and stared around this hopeful, civilized version of Jakku. The First Order did _this?_ Came in, got rid of Plutt and his thugs, put in a public water dispensary, built housing and provided medical care and education?

The dizziness that swept her was growing familiar. She put a hand to her head.

“Ma’am?” a vocabulator-distorted voice said behind her. “Do you need assistance?”

Rey quickly tugged her wrappings back in place and turned. Two stormtroopers faced her.

“No. Thanks. I’m fine.” She tried to sound hearty.

“The sun here can get to newcomers,” the trooper said. “We can accompany you to the medcenter if you need it.”

“Thanks,” she said again. “I’m good.” _Go away_, she thought.

The roar of ships’ engines came from overhead. Rey looked up and went cold. She’d seen a shuttle like that—black and wide-winged—once before: in the skies above Maz’s castle before it was blasted to ruins.

“Hey,” one of the troopers said. “Isn’t that the Grand Master’s shuttle?”

“Wonder what he’s doing here,” the other said.

They excused themselves and turned away just as the howl of TIE fighters came. Rey’s heart crowded into her throat. Shaking with the effort, she forced herself to stand and watch the incoming ships, pretending to be only interested. The moment the troopers were out of sight, she ran for the landing field.

Too late. By the time she skidded to a halt in the dust, the First Order shuttle was on the ground, its wings folded up. A squad of stormtroopers marched down the ramp in double file. And behind them—

Behind them came a tall, powerful figure dressed all in black—boots, cloak, gloves, tunic. Shaggy black hair framed a pale, scarred face.

Everything in Rey screamed for her to run. _Don’t run, don’t run, don’t run_, she chanted to herself. _You’re curious. See the crowd there at the edge of the bazaar? They’re curious too. You’ve done your looking. Now turn, nice and slow. Walk toward the crowd. Nice and slow. You can sift out the back. They’ll never see you_.

She turned. She walked nice and slow, her heart beating so hard it took her breath. Her mouth was as dry as if she’d been out in the desert all day without water. No one in the crowd looked at her twice as she joined them, as she took a step back, then another, allowing others to push in front of her where they could see.

With the throng between her and Kylo Ren, she slipped quietly into the mazes of the bazaar.

* * *

Kylo’s head snapped up, turning like a compass needle dragged by a magnet. A slim figure swaddled in wraps and a pale cloak joined the crowd of gawkers near the tents. The next moment, it disappeared, swallowed by the press of bodies.

“She’s here,” he said to the white-armored man beside him. “Make sure she stays here.”

“Yes, sir,” Dare said, anonymous under his helmet. “We already have guards stationed both on board and outside her ship.”

“Good,” Kylo said.

It wouldn’t be long now.

_* * *_

Rey was on the Pilgrims’ Road, hurrying to catch up with a group of travelers returning to one of the Sacred Villages. It was only luck that let her see what happened before she was close enough to be noticed: stormtroopers on speeder bikes swept in across the flats and stopped them. Rey hesitated just long enough to see the travelers removing their headgear.

The troopers were stopping people to identify them.

Panic threatened to overwhelm her. She hadn’t survived as long as she had by succumbing to it.

A pair of TIEs roared past overhead. There was no getting out of Niima Outpost. The flats surrounding it, where anyone crossing was visible for kliks around, guaranteed that.

While the stormtroopers were busy with the Sacred Village travelers, she turned and headed back again.

* * *

Kylo could _feel_ her fear—Rey knew she was being hunted.

She was smart and determined. He wouldn’t underestimate her. Nor could he push her into a fight. She was too strong. People would die.

For this hunt, he’d have to be patient and lay his trap carefully.

* * *

Not only was her ship guarded, Rey found _all_ the ships were. From the shadow of a boot repair tent, she watched the movement of white-armored figures around the landing field. She’d have to work out a way to get close.

A stormtrooper’s armor would be ideal. Someone must’ve anticipated the ploy, though—everywhere she saw them, the troopers moved in pairs or more. The officers, on the other hand…

It was riskier. Her face wouldn’t be concealed, and all the evidence pointed to the fact that they knew what she looked like. But it was the only chance she had.

She watched and waited until she spotted her target, a woman about her size. Then it was just a matter of waiting for her chance.

One thing Jakku taught you was patience. You didn’t survive an environment as dangerous as Jakku’s without it. It was hard, but Rey let two or three opportunities pass by before she decided to move.

Night had fallen. The landing field was brightly lit, but it only made shadows all the darker.

The woman stood in the shadow of the landing field’s half-ruined gate, speaking with two stormtroopers. The conversation ended and the troopers walked away, back toward the bazaar. Looking down at the datapad in her hands, the officer turned back toward the ships.

Rey darted out from her hiding place by the water resupply station. At the sound of her boots crunching softly in the grit, the woman turned.

There was a trick she’d learned—stop the moment someone catches sight of you. It made them hesitate just an instant and question: was this person a threat, or not?

Rey stopped, smiled. The officer’s doubt showed on her face, then she opened her mouth to shout. Rey closed the two steps between them. Whipping her blaster from behind her back, she jammed it into the woman’s gut and pulled the trigger.

It was set on the lowest stun setting. The weapon gave a soft _chuff_, and the woman crumpled. Rey caught her as she fell and dragged her under the resupply station’s tank and pipes.

A few minutes later, dressed in a First Order officer’s uniform and cap, Rey strode out into the lights of the landing field and toward the black First Order shuttle.

She didn’t fool herself that she’d be able to board a ship right away. This, too, would be a waiting game, hiding in plain sight until the right moment came. She pulled her cap down as low as she dared and pretended to be engrossed in her datapad.

She’d almost made it to the boarding ramp when the sound of heavy footsteps and Kylo Ren’s voice came from inside the shuttle.

He would see her face and know her. Rey instantly changed direction, heading for the shuttle’s towering wing as he came down the ramp.

The wing cast a sharp black shadow across the ground. Rey disappeared into it, straining her ears for any hint she’d been recognized. Her pulse rushed in her ears like Ahch-To’s seas. Her mouth tasted of metal. Jakku’s night, always cold, grew suddenly much, much colder.

She didn’t dare turn around, so she couldn’t see who Kylo was speaking to. The sound of his voice did strange things to her. The part of her hiding in the shadow of a shuttle’s wing remembered him arrogantly telling her, _You know I can take whatever I want_, while she was bound and helpless and terrified. He terrified her now. Another part wanted to rush out into the light. It would be such a _relief_, just get it over with—

No. She could do this. Her chance would come, and she’d get out of this. She just had to focus, stay calm, and it would happen.

“She’s been damaged.” Kylo’s voice came from a few meters behind her, probably at the base of the ramp. “She doesn’t remember anything. Not the New Order, not the Grey Guard, not the Grey Jedi.”

He was walking in her direction as he spoke—she could hear the crunch of his boots on the dirt. Rey casually moved away as if she was making no attempt to hide at all, out of sight around the shuttle’s aft end. Her ears began to ring threateningly. She realized she was hyperventilating and forced herself to breathe slowly—in, out.

The other man spoke, his voice unintelligible through the vocabulator.

“No,” Kylo replied. “She believes the First Order destroyed the Resistance. She doesn’t realize the Resistance, those who wanted to remain part of a peace-keeping force, integrated with the New Order.”

He came into view past the wing’s trailing edge. Rey wrenched her face forward, snapping to attention in profile to him. She clenched her jaw to stay still. The datapad creaked with the force of her grip. _I’m just an officer doing her duty_, she thought. _No one worth notice_.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see him standing in the blaze of lights. She didn’t hear a reply to his words this time.

“Under the circumstances,” Kylo said, “I’d expect her to go home, to Chandrila. At least to the estate on Naboo, or to Unity Station. Places she’s been safe and happy.”

As he spoke, memory began to flicker, like a light playing across wreckage in the darkness of a starship’s hulk. Images rose in her mind: a swing under a gazebo looking out on a gleaming lake, a warm arm around her shoulders, the rich, fruity taste of wine on her tongue, a breeze teasing her hair. Ornate domed houses with colonnades, the music of waterfalls, the sweet scent of flowers. A hanging city with balconies and wide windows and bridges that soared over an endless abyss, the tinkle of chimes.

Rey blinked hard, scrambling to hold onto the fleeting images.

“Why come here, as if it’s the last familiar place to her?” Kylo was saying. “It’s almost like the last ten years never happened.”

Rey staggered. _Ten years!_ Ten years?

A grey glitter closed around the edges of her vision. The growl of patrolling TIEs, the tramp of stormtroopers’ boots and squawk of their voices through vocabulators echoed strangely. She forced herself to concentrate on Kylo, scant meters away, the cold night air smelling of dust and starship fuel, the bite of the datapad’s edges into her palm. The threatening greyness receded.

“Five Force-users and the Nightfolk defeating the last of Hux’s loyalists at Rakata?” Kylo said. “I agree. That should be impossible to forget. Especially my uncle agreeing to join three darksiders in the venture. Rey was almost as surprised as I was.”

A strange uncertainty crept over her: was he talking to the person she couldn’t see or hear…

Or to her?

There was a scuffling sound and a flurry of motion off to her left. Rey glanced automatically, only moving her eyes. A small creature scuttled to a stop in front of her, looking up at her out of big, round, purple eyes.

Kylo was still talking to his unseen, unheard companion. “No,” he said. “No, I know. How could she not remember the wedding of her friends Finn and Rose? When Poe Dameron challenged me—_me!_—to a fighter dogfight. He was drunk,” Kylo grumbled. “I let him win. It was the least I could do.”

The creature on the ground in front of her cocked its head, twitched its tufted ears and sat up on its haunches. Folding its little hands in front of it, it gave a questioning cheep. Rey couldn’t help it—she smiled.

“Do you like him?” Kylo said.

Still standing rigidly at attention, Rey darted her eyes to him.

_He was looking at her_.

She sucked a breath and took one step, every muscle tensed to launch herself away.

Kylo’s hand snapped up. “Don’t try to run, Rey. No one is going to hurt you.”

Calm flowed into her, warm and comforting. She thought she should fight it, cling to the fear making her heart hammer wildly. She couldn’t bring herself to.

He didn’t move, but his dark eyes pinned her where she stood. “Do you remember Kreet?”

She looked down at the little animal. Its long, striped tail quivered expectantly. She gave the slightest shake of the head, _no_, then memories poured into her mind: the tickle of a furry tail under her chin, the grip of little hands on her shoulders. The slightly spicy, slightly musky smell of warm fur.

She nodded: _yes_. _I remember_.

The creature held up its hands.

“He wants you to pick him up,” Kylo said. “Go ahead.”

She darted another glance at him. He didn’t move, only watched her. Slowly, watching for any sudden moves, she bent and held out a hand. The little animal gave a chittering purr, jumped and scampered up her arm to her shoulder. Startled, she froze, then it burrowed its face into her hair and licked her ear with a rough, dry tongue. Giggling, Rey ducked her head.

Kylo eased a slow step closer. “Do you remember me?”

She tensed and her laughter died. “Kylo Ren.”

“Do you remember who else I am?”

Knowledge beat at her mind, a churning surge of memory just out of reach…

“I’m Ben.” He paused, then added gently, “Your husband.”

Going cold, she took a step back. “No,” she breathed.

He took a step, closing the distance between them again. “We were married on Unity Station ten years ago. You wear my wedding token on a chain around your neck—the signet of the Princes of Alderaan. An opal set in gold.”

Her hand shaking so hard it was hard to close her fingers, Rey touched the chain she wore, drew it out.

A gold ring with an opal in a knurled, ornate setting hung from it.

It all came rushing back—the cheering crowd, she and Ben with their wrists bound together with the same chain she now wore around her neck, the music of flutes, the soaring happiness of _belonging_.

Every day and month and year since, the fullness of being loved and treasured. The moments of annoyance, times of joy, bursts of anger or sadness.

She caught a breath, blinking hard. The next breath, she dissolved into tears, sobbing so hard she could barely breathe. Kylo surged toward her. With a startled squeak, Kreet jumped off her shoulder.

Kylo’s arms came around her, strained her to him. His rich, dark scent surrounded her, completely familiar. The scent of _home_. A sense of unutterable relief swept her, echoing her own.

He cupped her head, kissed her hair. “Shh, sweetheart. You’re with me now. You’re safe.”

She clung to him. “What happened? Why—why—”

“What do you remember?”

She took a breath, then another, wrestling herself under control.

“I was on Ryloth, returning the Twi’lek slaves we freed from the Black Sun slaver.” Her voice wavered, and she cleared her throat. “I was flying back to rendezvous with the ship—” She shook her head, touched her temple. “Something happened. Suddenly there were alarms going off. I saw a star destroyer and TIE fighters in my viewport. I thought—I _knew_ they were First Order.” She dropped her hand to look up at him. “I ran.”

He smoothed her hair. “When we took that slaver, it wasn’t a sting—it was a setup. Black Sun made sure we knew about the shipment,” he explained. “They also know we’ve been repatriating slaves. They knew you’d go to Ryloth and waited for you. A dozen heavily-armed Black Sun ships dropped out of hyperspace just as you attained orbit. They attacked you and your escort, meaning to take you hostage.”

Rey’s eyes went wide.

“You were outgunned,” Kylo said. “They took out several of your escort. But they don’t know how strong you are with the Force. Or they didn’t believe it.” A haunted look passed over his face and a coil of dread came over the bond. “We got the distress call. We came out of hyperspace in time to see you blast a dozen ships away with the Force.”

“I don’t remember.” Her voice came out in a whisper. “I thought you were— How could I forget—_us? _How could I forget—”

“It should’ve killed you, Rey.” His voice was rough with emotion. “It only damaged your memory. The Force must want you alive.” Closing his eyes, he swallowed hard. “_I_ want you alive. For a very long time.”

He crushed her in his arms again. “I was afraid I’d lose you, Rey,” he whispered into her hair. “When you ran, when all I could sense thorough the bond was fear, I knew something terrible had happened. I was afraid you’d disappear somewhere I couldn’t find you. You were hurt, and I couldn’t help you.”

Rey squeezed him just as hard, grateful for the anchor of his big, solid body. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know—”

“I know. That was the worst part, knowing that even when I caught up with you, you’d be afraid of me.”

She pulled back enough to look up at him. “But Ben, when I heard your voice, that was the first time I wanted to stop running.”

His eyes glistened with wetness. He slipped his hand behind her neck, bent his head and kissed her, hungrily, desperately. Threading her fingers through his thick waves, she kissed him back with every bit of gratitude and relief surging through her.

Finally, they broke apart.

Kylo raised a black-gloved hand to cup her cheek. “Would you like to see the children?”

“They’re _here?”_ she said, startled.

“I brought them.” His gaze fell. “If I couldn’t bring you back, I hoped they could.”

Her eyes filled with tears again. “Oh, Ben.”

He took her hand, led her around the shuttle. She couldn’t see the faces of the stormtroopers they passed, but she felt their joy and relief at seeing her hand-in-hand with Kylo.

He drew her up the boarding ramp as Kreet bounded ahead.

Under the watchful gazes of four Nightfolk, three children sat inside. The worry on their faces dissolved the moment they caught sight of Rey.

“Mama!” all three cried at once and ran to her.

Rey went down on her knees to receive them. Three pairs of small arms embraced her. Wet cheeks were pressed to her own cheek, just as wet. Kreet raced around them, cheeping with excitement.

The oldest, Hanna, was the first to pull back and study Rey much more seriously than any seven-year-old should. “Are you okay, Mama? I felt you. You were really, really scared. You’re not scared anymore, are you?”

Rey smoothed back her rich brown hair. Of the three of them, Hanna favored Rey, with her golden skin and faint dusting of freckles. The two younger kids both had Kylo’s black hair and pale complexion. Hanna had her father’s heart, though—sensitive and serious.

Kreet climbed up to her shoulder and wrapped his striped tail around her neck. She absently petted him.

“No, I’m not scared anymore,” Rey assured her. “Your dad came and talked to me. I realized I don’t have anything to be afraid of.”

Niki wiped his cheeks with the back of one hand, scowling to hide the fact that he’d been crying. At six, he was beginning to be conscious of his male dignity. “I’m gonna _get_ those Black Sunnies,” he said.

“So am I,” Kylo muttered darkly.

“Dad said they were trying to _kidnap_ you,” Niki went on. “Dad said only _he_ gets to kidnap you.”

Kylo gave a cough that sounded suspiciously like a laugh.

Rey gave him a look of reproach. “Dad doesn’t get to kidnap me, either. Maybe someday he’ll tell you what happened when he did.”

“I know, I know!” Little four-year-old Leia bounced on her feet, her green eyes gleaming. “Dad told us.” She took a long breath and began in a sing-song voice, as if reciting a story, “Dad saw a desert princess in the woods. She was so-o-o-o beautiful he followed her, but she ran away ‘cause she was scared of his mask and lightsaber. Then he catched her and made her go to sleep so she wouldn’t be scared and brung her on his ship so he could talk to her when she woked up.”

Her arms still around her children, Rey sat back on her heels. Kylo had turned their tale into a _bedtime story?_ A shiver went through her. She wasn’t sure she wanted to hear it. Not after she’d just relived it.

“It wasn’t ‘cause she was _beautiful_,” Niki said in disgust. “It was ‘cause she _called_ to him ‘cause they’re bonded through the Force.”

“Why are you guys telling this story now?” Hanna said. “Can’t you feel Mama doesn’t want to hear it? She just barely got away from gangsters!”

“But I was gonna tell the part about the scar!” Leia said.

This time it was Rey who had to choke back a laugh. She kissed Leia. “You can tell me the part about the scar later, okay?” She slid a wicked smile up at Kylo. “_That_ part I want to hear.”

“Mama,” Niki said, his eyes shining. “That was hekka mag._ Poom!_” He thrust both arms outward. The Nightfolk rocked a little on their feet. Sometimes when Niki got excited, he forgot not to _use_ the Force when he talked about it. “I saw on the holo. You threw those Black Sunnies like toys! Where’d you go? Did some get away? Were you hunting them?”

She smoothed his hair. Like always, it refused to be smoothed, an untamable black mane. “I was hunting for myself.”

“Next time, don’t go by yourself,” Hanna said sternly. “Dad was _really_ worried. We could all feel it.”

Leia hugged Rey tight and whispered into her neck, “We were worried, too.”

Kylo ruffled Leia’s fine, black hair. “I was keeping track of her, sweetheart. I wasn’t going to let her get away.”

Smiling, Rey reached up and took his hand. “You never do, do you?”

He brought her hand to his lips and kissed her fingers. His eyes were dark and deep enough to get lost in. “Never.”

**Author's Note:**

> Yes, the kids are all Force-sensitive. And "Niki" is short for Anakin. 😉
> 
> After Princess of Jakku asked me at the end of "Darkness, Take My Hand" for a ten-years-later story of Kylo and Rey, I've been pondering, but nothing exciting came to me. Then my subconscious stepped in.
> 
> Much of this story comes from a detailed dream, especially the last part, where Kylo finally catches up to Rey. It was like watching my own personal Star Wars movie. When I woke up just as Rey's memories start coming back, I was saying, "No! Go back to sleep! I want to see what happens!" I just had to put it together so it makes more sense than a dream.


End file.
